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When a member of a family comes home, they can perceive a message of well-being or tension without the need to look at the face of the rest of the family. This tends to happen more frequently the closer the relationship is between people, since in these cases that perception will be more important and non-verbal communication will be more evident. Sometimes the lack of dialogue is a serious limitation to communication.
Many times, the rush of parents to receive some information, prevents them from knowing the opinion of their children and, in the same way, prevents their children from noticing the open attitude and predisposition to listen from parents. The previous situations it's specially important in the adolescence. There are many situations in which parents are curious about what their children are doing and, when faced with a demanding situation, they respond evasively.
Another impediment to communication is the impatience of some parents to be able to influence their children's behavior educationally. The entire educational process goes through the relationship established by parents and children, and this is supported by communication; That is why it is so important to preserve it and maintain the joy of enjoying it. For this, it is enough that parents do not want to always be right and convince themselves that communicating is not confronting.
Family life also has clear enemies to establish conversations and interpersonal relationships. Television at lunch, hours that make it difficult to meet in a relaxed way, weekend trips ... We must fight against these situations and adopt an attitude of resistance, creating a climate that facilitates communication.
1- Generalizations: You're always hitting your sister, you never obey. Surely, at some point, he does something other than hit his sister. Possibly, at some time, he has known how to obey.
2- Judging the messages you receive: The mother, when the father comes from the street, says: It seems that you arrive later today. The father replies: What happens ?, the other days I arrive before ?. You are always aware of the time I come!
3- Not knowing how to listen to fully understand what others really mean.
4- Discussions about the version of something that happened a long time ago. Why give so much importance to past events?
5- Establishment of labels. Avoid always cataloging similar situations or behaviors in the same way, remembering a specific event.
6- Application of conflicting objectives. If one time seemed good to you, avoid the next one being the other way around.
7- The place and time we choose. Choosing a good time or place can promote family communication.
8- Exposition of questions full of reproaches. Reproaches hinder good communication.
9- Modes of expression. The abuse of: You should, I should do; instead of the: What do you think if ..., Maybe it suits you, I want to do, It suits me, I have decided.
10- cuts in conversation. More attention is paid to what you want to say than to listening to the other.
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